Friday, February 10, 2017

New things

I met someone . He's interesting and smart . I'm always careful and guarded , I get rid of everyone for small things . But I'm giving this a chance . That means I'm putting my fears in the back seat . It's really hard to do . Sometimes it gets over whelming the fear of being let down or hurt . But as I sat with him on our date I could see myself waking up to him , drinking coffee . Not like the night after coffee . But something real . I can talk to him , I can relate to him . These things have been rare . Goes deeper than the small things . We been talking a month there is still a lot to know about him . But there isn't anything telling me to move away . To give up , to run away . Like my normal self would do . He doesn't fit the bad boy type I normally go for . But he seems to be a better fit for me . We'll see where it goes .

Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Dying

I thought for sure you would come home . So much time has passed and your not here . I met someone new , I'll give it a chance , he never reads my writing and that's my heart so I don't know , how can you be my best friend if you don't read what's the best part of me ? The jury is still out on this one . A year has passed quickly . My heart seems to be getting worse my biggest fear is dying and I'm alone . I'm alone right now . The music plays . I'm tired of hearing how pretty I am how am I single but yet here I am alone . People who acted like they cared aren't here , no one is .