Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Cocktails

Freedom comes from the one who left..
and I beckon the audience who stands before me,
and I am standing here in the deepest ocean ,
can you see me ?
I will never drown,
I am the power you tried to sustain,
and I...
turn my back on you as you call my name ,
and I ask my audience can they keep up with me?
who will be my next intention?
for I am a virgin to love,
a whore to life ,
come share my leather secrets,
can you get past my disguise ?
I dare you to try !
Shattered glass might scar you left from broken hearts
but I can mend you ,
If you can stand with me in my ocean
if you can catch me
if you can keep me
blood and bone
and don't forget sweat
swallow me
do you see me ?
As I stand here bare...
scared...
empty...
power..
My audience...
written -Amy Everett
9-29-08



This poem is about mending and trying to find my power.. I like her strength this poem brings..

Saturday, September 27, 2008

My thoughts on Decay

Decay , I love her because it is really a conversation between myself about this guy who never gave me his heart and he leaves me like no big deal after putting me through all this turmoil and making huge promises.. and he just walks away.. I love this poem because it was one of the most important conversations Iv'e ever had with me.. It was hard leaving this man because I have been with alot of men but he was the first person I really gave my heart to, the first man I gave my trust to, I gave him everything. And as a rape victim to give a man that power that was hard for me. But I was proud of myself that I had done it finally... But this guy was to selfish to go fix his own problems , so he just left.. Isn't that sad.. I know I deserve better than that.. But it was hard ... because ideally he was my first of everything.. because I let him in.. and he was my biggest dissapointment.. can you imagine that? So this poem she is a great friend to me too..

Thursday, September 25, 2008

My thoughts on the devil himself..

Yes my post dance with Satan she is a friend to me this poem... she is helping me through a tough time, getting over this devil.. have you ever shared to many drinks with the devil?

I guess all I can do now is write about it so I don't lose my sanity....

My Dance with Satan

dance with me darling ,
what a handsome smile,
never knew you were Satan ,
never knew he had angel wings and a fast car and silk sheets,
alligator teeth, satin words, simple promises melt like chocolate liqueur and
the way we lied naked ,
I would come to you in the middle of the night only wearing panties and you gave me the keys to your house and your car and your children's heart...
but you my friend were the thief in the night all along...
trembling ,
I stood in your shower ,
in your arms,
thought I was safe,
even have your name tattooed on my arm,
and you say forever ,
and you leave me ,
No reason !
And I loved the dance ,
I danced with Satan,
I drive now alone,
I still feel you,
I still taste you...
wondering what went wrong,
a year wasted ...
used , bruised ...
I am ashamed , that I still watch for you driving down the street ,
that I even miss such a murder scene ...
And I wonder,
as I look in the mirror,
why?
and I stand here alone in my black lace panties ...
left for someone else to love...
but all I wanted was you...
Fuck You...
written Amy Everett 9-24-08
Ct

About Me

Carpe Diem.... Life Is A Stage .. What is your part.. Live without regret..Live loudly..Wish Big...Always accept an invitation.. Always follow your dreams.. Always love like you've never been hurt before.. Always hold onto your Aces..Dance like you drank a little too much..Never let any one tell you who you are.. Always be who you are.. Never let any one yell at you and tell you it's all your fault ... We are here to be loved not misused , abused , or taken for granted.. Never forget to Pray because God never forgets you... I love Italian Food and I love to live dangerously.. I love scary movies and I want to go back packing ... My dream is to see castles in England and to find my prince who can give his heart whole heartedly... I love to write poetry , The ocean is my sanity , I love to smile.. I love my friends they're always there to catch me when I fall .. or when I've been pushed around.. I love my son Austin he is my hero.. My light at the end of every tunnel.. God is my passion he leads me through every dark night.. and every scary battle.. And here I am now.. Loving you ... Loving life for all that it has to give me.. Good and bad.. tears and smiles.. Nights of loneliness and some full of love... Lets all do this ride together.... Here we go. No Regrets...

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

www.thisisbyus.com

I love to write! Please check me out on this great writing site...

I'm Just A Sailor...

I am a sailor,
sitting on the bow,
I am an artist, I am free, meant to chase dreams... chasing castles... setting fire to fairy tales and glass slippers... I make the rules and the red baron is my friend and angels tip their hats and we smoke our cigars...
and I am.. the strength that sets your weakness free... and they use me until their brokenness is no longer a disease.... don't they know I can see? and I scream, and this ship sets sail.. in this uncertain sea,
and they prey upon my strength , and I take a bow ... should it be a compliment when I realize when they are done with me, I'm left here to be all alone...
and I dance on the deck of my war ship with the devil and he asks me for a cigarette .. and I tell him no more games.. and God contemplates and it begins to rain...
and I am...
a sailor...
sitting on the bow...
an artist... setting fire to fairy tales .... and I ask the red baron how he gets the chance to fly away from all of this... to be free... because I was meant for chasing dreams...
written by -Amy Everett 8-23-08

Decay

Does the toxicity of goodbye out weigh the adventures of what tomorrow might bring,
Does knowing my worth out weigh the loss of a soul mate,
or does that transcend the fact that it was merely a demon in angel wings....How do we know ? Shouldn't we know, marked by rings of scars ... Traveling through miles of lifetimes shouldn't we see the pain coming?
A black halo from the white... The dimming .... from the light?
Where is the warning.. When we lie face down on the snow when they deliver the black rose... And we do not accept the defeat... no...But why should we accept loneliness for the hundredth time... to be thrown away ... who wants to be friends with time... She crushes me like bitter glass and buries me in a vast ocean ...
In a grave marked where they all lay... The cowards who could not be brave enough to stand by my side.. No.. they were too afraid... and I lie here...with my crown... my sword.. My armor...
But without you.... But this time I wanted you... For the first time I gave it all...
Through metal and scars...
I gave it all for you...
trusted you...
died for you....
to walk away....
And I lie here....
And I know... I will walk again.. but I wanted to walk with you.... 08-05-08
Written by-Amy Everett

Favorite Poem By Uncle Walt

O Christ! This is mastering me! In at the conquer’d doors they crowd. I am possess’d. I embody all presences outlaw’d or suffering; See myself in prison shaped like another man, And feel the dull unintermitted pain. For me the keepers of convicts shoulder their carbines and keep watch; It is I let out in the morning, and barr’d at night. Not a mutineer walks handcuff’d to jail, but I am handcuff’d to him and walk by his side; (I am less the jolly one there, and more the silent one, with sweat on my twitching lips.) Not a youngster is taken for larceny, but I go up too, and am tried and sentenced. Not a cholera patient lies at the last gasp, but I also lie at the last gasp; My face is ash-color’d—my sinews gnarl—away from me people retreat. Askers embody themselves in me, and I am embodied in them; I project my hat, sit shame-faced, and beg. Enough! enough! enough! Somehow I have been stunn’d. Stand back! Give me a little time beyond my cuff’d head, slumbers, dreams, gaping; I discover myself on the verge of a usual mistake. That I could forget the mockers and insults! That I could forget the trickling tears, and the blows of the bludgeons and hammers! That I could look with a separate look on my own crucifixion and bloody crowning. I remember now; I resume the overstaid fraction; The grave of rock multiplies what has been confided to it, or to any graves; Corpses rise, gashes heal, fastenings roll from me. I troop forth replenish’d with supreme power, one of an average unending procession; Inland and sea-coast we go, and we pass all boundary lines; Our swift ordinances on their way over the whole earth; The blossoms we wear in our hats the growth of thousands of years. -Walt Whitman

Disfigured

Displaced
shattered
disfigured.....
aching on the ground
I fall into the stream of disregard
forgotten by all
I thought held me
in contempt of heart...
brittle skeletons
left to move
fast through vast
dreams and memories
left to be stranded, to be strong
and I wonder
can I do it
and be proud
of who I am
of who I was
before you
branded me
bruised me
before you stole my generations
before you knelt in front of me eye to eye
and stole my crown like a wolf in sheep's clothing
and I stand bare,
as you walk this earth…
a martyr with everything,
plus my strength,
my heart and all it had to give
you walk
and the smile
you ripped from my face!
do you wear it proud?
skeletons in your closet now
how close do they lay
to the surface of your skin
as you sleep at night?
This pool of abandonment
drowns my last breath of life
and I try to walk
bent
but I am not dead-written by-amy everett
written for CT